Have you ever thought about what it would be like to just have planned c-section? The ease of just walking in at a scheduled time and having a baby with a perfectly round head? Relief! That’s what I felt when my doctor first told me that I was going to need a schedule Cesarian while expecting my oldest. I can hear the angels singing now, except for the part where my baby was breech. That part truly sucked! Honestly all I could think of was I don’t have to go through Labor? Add a few more pregnancies, and the third surgery, well that is where the nightmare begins.
My first Section went perfectly and effortlessly! I felt awesome and I had the cutest little baby so what’s not to be happy about! Feeling triumphant I even remember laughing at the little cone head babies pictures online from the hospital website. I know, I was wrong for that, and my hubby ever so sarcastically pointed that out. don’t hate me I was hormonal.
The second time around, the doc left the decision up to me, so Naturally a second C-section it is! Why would I ever go into labor? Post surgery recovery was a little more intense that time around. The pain was more intense but I made it okay, and I have a pretty high pain tolerance so we managed. My mother in law kept feeling the need to remind me that I had major surgery and needed to rest. Laughing at her I said ” I have two babies to take care of now, who has time for that?’
For the third time around, well this is where my nightmare truly begins. For those of you that follow me, then I will not go back into the story of my son’s birth as you have seen that recently. For those that have not seen it, you can find it here. My nightmare began after his birth.
We were home all of two days when I began to notice an odor, and being the vain person I am all I could thing was that the doctor must do something about that, because smelling bad down there was not an option! It was horrible and all the while it never occurred to me that it could be my incision.
It was at my post op appointment where the nurse came in to remove the staples and immediately noticed the smell. Laughing I said, I know it’s so gross, we will need to get the doc to take care of that for me, and that’s when the look on her face suddenly changed. We went from laughing and joking to straight-faced and quiet in two seconds and she stepped out of the room to get the doctor.
Walking in with her serious face on Doctor V takes a look and tells me that she thinks it is infected and that there is likely to be a wound. The smell was coming from drainage at the incision site. They began to take out the staples and before Doctor V could say there it is, I could feel it! The warm rush of the fluid sliding down my body! Instantly I cried knowing that this was the beginning of a difficult recovery. thankfully still numb from the surgery, they cultured it and placed a new bandage on.
Talks of home health care and wound centers began with the possibility of antibiotics went on as I fought to keep my head spinning from the news. I just had a baby for crying out loud and your telling me I can’t drive, or well do anything! How are we supposed to deal with this!
What should have been the happiest days of my life quickly became a total nightmare! At my first wound center appointment the wound was deeper than they thought and I had to have a wound vac, which is essentially a vacuum that hangs on the outside of my body sucking the drainage from the inside out to speed the healing process. This is something I do for my patients, this is not something that happens to me, and yet here I was!
Three days a week I had to have this dressing changed out by nurses I know and a physician I respected! they were nothing short of amazing, but having my vagina out and open for them is not my idea of a good time! Especially as they ripped the dressing that was stuck to my growing pubic hair that they were now ripping out one by one! Yeah you can thank me later for that visual!
For almost over two months I wore this vacuum having to remember to keep it charged and un plug it at night when it was time to feed the baby. Depressed and scared mush of those days felt like being on autopilot! Just going through the motions and trying to make the best of the situation.
My husband and I were talking the other day, which in turn inspired this post! We do not have any video from when Little man was so small! So much was going on back then, that we honestly didn’t even think of it! I hate that we do not have those moments recorded, and while I have a lot of photos, I will never hear those giggles or that sweet cry. If I could go back I would have never scheduled that second Cesarian! I would have tried it the way god intended for us to have babies. If you are pregnant and thinking of a C -section then I urge you to rethink that decision! I will never know what labor feels like, or what it feels like to push your baby out, and I feel robbed of that experience. now. Hindsight is 20/20 and knowing now what I know I would have done it all over again! What about you? What are your thoughts on Scheduled C-sections?