Posted in mommyhood

Reflecting on the holidays without the haze

The holidays are approaching us as evidenced by the christmas music blaring through target on November first of thoses year! it still amazes me that we listen to christmas before we can even get through Thanksgiving. I was walking down the coffee aisle which is conveniently located across from the wine aisle when a mother and daughter duo came rushing by.

The daughter appeared to be between four and five and had curly blinde hair sitting in the front seat of the cart. Mom suddenly stopped and said ooh wine. Now what happened next caught me a little off guard and if I am being honest amused me a little. Not in a judgemental way, but in a Thank Gawwd, that didnt happen to me way. However, it most likely would not have happened to me.

I know by now you are wondering ehat happened so without further ado, here goes. That sweet little girl grabbed he mom’s face and said no! I dont want you getting drunk tonight. Bless her heart she was just as sweet as she cohld be while telling that to her mom, but like I said. THANK gawwd IT Wasn’t me.

I began to reflect on why this paticular occurrence would not haooen to me and its quite simple. I do not drink in front of my kids. I May or may not have a 2yo that says shit every now and then, but I will not be accused of getting drunk. I do not judge anyone for doing this but its just not for me.

This fact has quite often been frustrating to my own family memebrs on the holidays as most tend to celebrate with a drink. Here is the deal. I do not want my children to associate Thanksgiving, Christmas or any other holiday with alcohol. Their memories need to be of mom and dad playing games with them, and eating pumpkin pie. Playing in the leaves and  not with mom or dad getting snockered.

Here is an even bigger deal.I need to remember their faces when they open their presents in Christmas morning, and how much they enjoyed their Ham and cresent rolls. I do not want these moment to slip by in a fog. I want to be present as holidays are about togetherness. Lets face it, these moments go by way too fast.  One day these kids will have their own kids.

By now you are probably thinking poor naive April, she thinks if she doesnt drink around her kids then they will not drink. This is not true. I will never hide the fact that I enjoy the occassional glass of red wine after the kids are asleep. In fact if my children were to ever ask, I would be honest with them about it and explain that it is a grown up decision. A decision not to be taken lightly. Above all else I hope that my kids can reflrect on their childhood with warm , loving memories. That we made sugar cookies every christmas eve, two years ago when we had a flour fight (our make  believe snowball fight), the times we sang christmas songs and of course the lights.  what they will not remember is mom paying more attention to her glass than them.

 

 

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Author:

I am a wife of ten years, mom of three, Nurse and student! My household is quite chaotic and busy. With a six year old going on sixteen. we shall call her "Sassy", a four year old, who is stubborn as a mule, she shall be called " mini me", and a one year old, we will call "Buddy". Our girls do Ballet, and our son, well he is all boy! Very curious and always getting in to something. When we found out we were having a boy i laughed and said " god must have known we needed a little less diva in our life," Ha, little boys are quite the handful! I love my kids with all of my heart, and i love my job too! As a nurse leader i get to see many sides to healthcare and help encourage and guide new nurses. I love taking care of patients and being able to have grown up talk and then come home to my babies. The house is usually chaotic with lots of tantrums, and messes, but i wouldn't change it for a bit. On the rare occasion that i am able to have some spare time to myself, i like to read, bake and decorate cakes, and take pictures of my kiddos. Time to myself is rare so i decided to start this blog to have a creative outlet and connect with other working moms, who might be going through the same situations as myself. I hope you enjoy my thoughts and stories as a mom, student, wife and Nurse! These stories will range from Diapers and tutus to meetings and boardrooms! and everything that falls in between. Enjoy and thanks for visiting my site.

5 thoughts on “Reflecting on the holidays without the haze

  1. Shops are packed with Christmas stuff for about two weeks already here! I really don’t get it! I find it annoying that they start so early. I mean, who buys that stuff now? By the time we approach Christmas you are kind of over seeing it…
    But by the shops are already putting Easter stuff out… So what…

    1. It’s insane right? My oldest said but mom it’s not even Halloween yet, why do they have Christmas stuff out? I honestly couldn’t give her an answer.

  2. And what I wanted to say, before I lost track, was that: Oh my! Poor girl! Well done for not drinking in front of your kids… You are right, they might assassinate drinks with certain events, moments. The holidays or when a day was hard… And it creates a pattern too. I remember when my husband once asked me why I wanted a glass of wine. It was after a long and hard day. And I said, because it was a long and hard day and I would like to relax. He asked me, why I needed the wine for it… And he got me thinking. It was what my mom used to do and say… So of course it is normal, it’s what you do…
    I am not talking about getting drunk, but just the idea of needing that wine to calm down is actually crazy…

    1. I am guilty of the sam thing though. I just wait till kids are asleep but have said before I just need to relax! It is kind of crazy when you think about it.

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