Thursday we sad Good-Bye to your tonsils. Your tonsils were very large and you had a condition known as obstructive sleep apnea. This condition caused you to stop breathing in your sleep. Scary, i know. I am amazed at how well you handled going in to surgery. I explained to you what was going to happen in words you could understand and you were fine with it. The nurses fawned all over you which of course you loved, and you even got to wear what you called emoji socks. The nurse thought that was too cute. I explained that your sisters have somewhat of an emoji obsession so you knew the term very well.
When the nurse asked if you wanted to ride in the wagon to the OR, you didn’t hesitate to jump in. I felt equally relieved and fearful of your braveness and courage. Part of my heart left with you as you went into surgery. You see, I am always with you. Always.
Once i sat back down in the waiting room i prayed for the doctors and nurses to have a healing hand and for a perfect surgery. There is always a risk with surgery and no one knows that better than your mom. Being a nurse is a blessing and a curse, because i always know how to make you feel better but i always know th worst case scenario.
What was roughly an hour, felt like eternity when the doctor came out and said you did great! He said that your tonsils had filled your entire air space and you should be able to breathe better almost immediately. We knew those suckers were big, but just didn’t know how big.
You were still sleeping when i arrived to recovery. Tears came to my eyes as i laid eyes on you. It’s one thing for someone to tell you your little boy is okay, but it is another story for you to see it for your own eyes. You had a wonderful nurse who took such good care of you. She was my favorite by far. I will always be grateful for her moment in your life. You woke up from anesthesia peacefully and we immediately gave you a popsicle, which you loved. You ate three orange popsicles just in the recovery unit alone.
Because of your age, we had to stay overnight in the hospital which you were not so understanding about. Every few minutes you would look at me and say “I’m done, I want out.” I remember thinking you must feel like you are in jail or something.
Do you remember peeing on me while I gave you pain medicine that night? Oh yeah, you didn’t like the pain medicine and made sure i knew it too. That poor nurse had to wash mommy’s clothes including my underwear because it was all I had with me at the time.
Thankfully the doctor came early the next morning and let us go home. You have done pretty well, but i am thankful you will never remember the pain. If anything i hope you remember all the cuddles we have shared. The other night, we were cuddling and i told you how sorry i was that you were in pain and felt so bad, your response melted my heart and suddenly i could hang on just a little longer. You rubbed your hand on my cheek and said “It’s okay mommy, I love you!” Even when you are stressed, in pain and exhausted, you are still the sweetest little boy. I hope you never lose that trait. Know that no matter what, I always love you too, and my heart is always with you.