Posted in mommyhood

Back to school….

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I am writing this post a couple of weeks late, but hey better late than never. The truth is, this is the only time that I have  to blog or event think about blogging.  Back to school, means back to school germs!! UGGH, YES!! I am sitting next to my sleeping four-year old just one day after starting pre-K with a fever and sore throat and since I can’t move because he has the senses of Spider-Man and the moves of  a ninja, I figured what the heck.. Anyways.. I digress.

Back to school always brings a bag full of mixed emotions for me. My oldest loves school and the routine it gives her, so for that I love going back to school. Now, for my 7yo, that’s another story. For her, it means constant struggles , constant teacher communication and constant fear that this may be the year that she is held back.

Last year in the first grade we received her ADHD diagnosis! Most would think yes, we finally have answers as to while she is struggling, and for part of me that was true. The other part, felt and still feels like the road will forever be long and we will have to constantly fight for her. And we will. We will fight for her, all day every day!

We were blessed with an incredible teacher last year who truly spent as much one on one time with her as possible. She and I texted almost every day about her progress and she went far beyond my expectations on helping our sweet 7yo move along and progress. While, that was wonderful I couldn’t and still can’t help but wonder about this upcoming year. Will her teacher be just as wonderful? Will we have to fight tooth and nail to get her any accommodations that she may need? I don’t know yet.

ADHD kids are supposed to get a 504 plan  to help for accommodations, but due to the fact that she may need an IEP, the school counsellor wanted to wait. This is something that I have had to fight for, and will most likely have to address soon. See, in order to ensure that she gets the accommodations that she may need guaranteed, you must have one of these. These can and should inlcude sitting in the front of the class to avoid distractions. allowing extra time to complete tests etc.

I worry constantly. I worry that her teacher will not be as awesome as last year’s. I worry that this kind of teacher is rare, and i have been set up for untealistic expectations. I worry about it all.

The medication has helped her quite a bit, and i think we are at a good dose now. While the medication is great for her in class, it has long worn off by the time she gets home from school. Which means homework is a battle.  A long, long battle of trying to get her to focus on the task at hand and stop noticing the lint on the floor that can barely be seen by the naked eye. That is, except her hyperaware little eyes that is.  Some nights are tolerable and some leaving me shaking and crying in the closet. It is life, life with an ADHD kid that is….

All these concerns circle my brain and the only thing i can do is pray. Pray that this year will be a little better. Pray that she has an engaged, and caring teacher. Pray for God’s perfect timing. Just Pray….

What tips/tricks/suggestions do you have for a mom new to this diagnosis that can help?

 

 

 

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Posted in mommyhood

We are moving on to Second grade!!!

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I was sitting at a coworkers desk when my phone vibrated. Looking down at the message, tears immediately slid from my eyes to my cheeks.  Images from this past year flashed through my mind. The first day of school, all of the struggles with homework, all of the frustration, realizing she needed an evaluation for ADHD, getting those results, and the decision to medicate. All of it down to her sheer determination to drown out all of the distraction in her mind, even before we had her ADHD diagnosis. It all flashed through my eyes and I cried.

The message was simple. Her teacher had texted me one line. She has passed the DRA 14!!! This is what we were waiting for! She needed to be able to focus enough on this one standardized reading level to pass the first grade! To make matters even more emotional, this was three weeks before the last day of school. Leave it to my child to pull it off at the last-minute! She’s passing, she was passing!!!! I had honestly resigned myself to the expectation that we would repeat the first grade despite how well she did in the other subjects in school. Her teacher was right, she knew how to read all along, she just needed help drowning out all the distractions!

It has been a whirlwind of a year, with a whirlwind of emotions to go with it. There has been frustration, tears, laughter, determination, anger at the school system for these standardized tests, hope, and fear. We have experienced them all. There has been weekly conversations with teachers, quarterly meetings with guidance counselors and visits to the pediatrician for month-long testing.

I am thankful for the path God has put us on. I am thankful for her teachers. She had two this year, and while the first one was not my favorite, she was the one mini me needed at the time. She not so subtly hinted that she felt mini me, had problems focusing possible had ADHD. In my mind, ADHD kids were always hyper, which she is not. Then, over the Christmas holidays, her first teacher retired and we got Ms. R.  Ms. R has been a blessing beyond blessings. She has worked with mini me one on one, dealt with my constant text messages and checking on her, and took the time to get creative with mini me, so that she could learn in the way that was best for her. She really went above and beyond for our little girl!

I am thankful for our pediatrician who also specializes in ADHD and put her through a month of testing before diagnosing her with ADHD. I have seen so many physicians just slap the ADHD label on kids with only a screening, and not performing certain tests. He really looked at the whole picture with my daughter, and i couldn’t more thankful for that! I am so thankful, for a pediatrician who asked the parents how we wanted to treat her symptoms. The decision to medicate was not an easy one, but it seems to be the right course for her.

I am thankful for my daughter, who despite all odds never gave up on herself and always tried. Even when everything in the world tried to distract her, she tried.  I have seen a change in her these last couple of months. She has been smiling more, and seems more confident. Before, I could see anxiety in her eyes when it became time to read. My baby girl, i am so unbelievable proud of you! You have had to work harder than a lot of kids this year and even if things didn’t work out the way we had wanted, i still would have been very proud of you!!!!

Now as the summer months begin and the last day of school has occurred, a whole new set of emotions occur! I have a fourth grader, a second grader, and a preschooler! All three in school. I just can’t even deal!

Posted in mommyhood

I am THAT Mom!

Yes, I am THAT mom! The one wearing the soccer mom hat, shamelessly cheering her kids on at the soccer game. The one who took over 400 photos at the soccer game. Yes… I am THAT mom!

I posted the above photo to my Facebook page  realizing that I had in fact become THAT mom! The one we made fun of as we began to start our families. You know, the ones we swore that we would never become. I would be a cool mom, at least that’s what I thought.

The truth is.. I am THAT mom. The one who drives a mini van piled high with toys and sports gear and can’t even begin to remember what it was like to drive a four door sedan. I mean, who does that?

I am THAT mom. The one who meddles when her child gets assigned to an awful soccer coach and emails the sportsplex to have her changed to another coach. Why  yes, I did that. I am THAT mom!

I am THAT mom. The one who calls her 7yo’s teacher almost daily to get a progress report. The one, who reads nightly and makes her read out loud nightly because she’s struggling. I am that mom!

I am the one whose kids enjoy the drive through a little too much. WE are busy, and its easy sometimes. I am that mom!

I am THAT mom! I am the one who sits with her kids during sunday school, because it was the only way to get them to children’s church. You know what? It worked! I am THAT MOM!

I am the mom who cries every year on the first day of school! It doesn’t matter how many years we have been doing this, I am  THAT mom!

I am the mom who asks too many questions about her kid’s school day, because I need to know. I am THAT mom!

I am the mom who will let her kids argue a little too long, just to see if they can resolve it on their own. Perhaps I let those go on way too long. I am THAT mom.

I am the mom who forgot to leave the tooth fairy money under the pillow, and had to do a triple twirl gymnastic move to get it under the pillow while her kid was stretching , praying the whole time she didn’t see you just slide five dollars under the pillow. I am THAT mom.

I am a helicopter  mom, a free range mom, a working mom.  I am a super strict mom, and little too relaxed mom, sometimes a Pinterest mom, and embarrassing mom, a sharing too much mom. I am all of them. I am THAT mom. Shout out to all the  mommies with all the personalities and all the labels. May we wear them all well 🙂

 

Posted in Baby Daddy

Date night and people watching

We did it! We finally made it out to an actual date night. For those of you who are close to us, then you know that there were several attempts at a date night in which we never made it. The most recent fiasco was when the 9yo had an ear infection.

WE never went out to dinner for our anniversary last month, so the husband  arranged for childcare for us to enjoy a kid free dinner. There has been several discussion at work about this new restaurant downtown, so we thought let’s give it a try. Why not?

It’s a trendy southern style restaurant with a twist. They serve the most unbelievable combinations that work! The food was good, and it was nice for us to have some alone time to talk. WE haven’t done much of that lately. It’s just between our busy schedules and spending half the night trying to get the kids to sleep leave little time to talk to your spouse.

What struck me at this restaurant, , was the amount of people watching I could do. This place is a dream for anyone who likes to people watch. What struck me as even more odd, was how old I felt. When you sit there and count how many men are wearing man buns ( both restaurant employees and customers alike), then you can consider yourself old. Old, married and with kids that is. This restaurant catered to either the young and hip, or the older and incredibly wealthy. Oh, how you could see all these rich people in this restaurant. it was quite interesting actually.

Sitting right next to us, was the ” I am rich and I want you to notice me crowd.” This was actually a family, two older parents and their son who looked to be mid twenties. They spent the night actually talking about money and real estate. Yeah, they were quite boring. Then across from us, was the obviously wealthy but very down to earth couple. I have an aunt and uncle like that. They clearly have tons of money, but are some of the most kindest and down to earth people I have ever met. At the bar, was a young girl with a slightly older man. He had a man bun, and she kept grabbing his ass. I am pretty sure her mom was at the bar with them. it was an odd situation. One minute they were all make outey and the next she was talking to her mom ( could be sister) and he was chugging a glass of wine faster than life itself.

As I said before, the food was decent, nice atmosphere, but us old married couples with three kids, well… we would be fine with chick fil a.  We actually had a great time, and the people watching was fun. Do you do that? Just sit back and watch how others interact with each other? In case you were wondering, we seen at least six man buns 😉

 

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Chocolate bannana cake with bananna gelato. Yes please!!!

 

Posted in mommyhood

Today I cried

Perhaps our eyes need to be washed by our tears once in a while,so that we can see life with a

No one likes to see their kid struggle. No one.. It has been an emotional couple of months with a rollercoaster of emotions to go right along with it. Ever since we received the diagnosis, we have faced a whirlwind of challenges. beginning making the decision to medicate, and now increasing that medication because the lowest dose  of her medication just isn’t working well enough.

This whole year I have tried to do it all. I have tried to be the dedicated employee, the reading tutor, mom, wife, while attempting to maintaining a clean household ( insert laugh here, failing at that one!), getting the other two kids to Soccer practice each week, arriving on time to each game ( all with having snacks, water and appropriate equipment) and finding time for me to possibly excercise read or just do something for me! It’s been hard y’all. Damn hard!

So today, as i was sitting yet again with the guidance counselor at school to discuss mini me’s performannce i cried. I cried because i don’t want her to have to repeat the first grade. I cried because i feel the weight of the world resting on my shoulders. I cried because i don’t feel like there is anyone i can talk to about all of this. I cried because part of me feels like a failure because i am not enough to help her overcome these challenges. Today, I just cried!

 

Posted in mommyhood

Community

I have been thinking about community a lot lately. Last weekend we attended a community event to raise  money for the children of a mother who was died violently in our area.  The event was kid friendly with carnival games, face painting and prizes for the little ones. There was even barrel racing and silent auctions. I was amazed at the sheer amount of people who not only volunteered their time, but donated the items for auction, food and prizes. You could feel God’s presence during this event as if he was wrapping his arms around these two children who will grow up without their mother.

Although, I did not know this woman personally, her story has sat with me for a while. This could happen to any of us, and the thought of leaving my children is just too much to bear .  It’s amazing what a group of people or community can do in the face of tragedy. WE can lift each other up, help one another, bring a sense of peace that was not there before. Which leads me to wonder, why can’t we do this every day?

My 7yo wrote the following paragraph on president’s day.

wp-1490191512111.jpgWouldn’t you vote for her? What a smart girl huh? My mommy pride was in beaming affect after reading this passage . Kids are much more intuitive than we ever give them credit for. You see, we drive by the same homeless man every day. I am pretty sure I have never mentioned him to the kids and just drive past as if he wasn’t standing there in need. I have wanted to stop, but have always been too busy, too everything i guess.  WE help in the mist of tragedy yet, aren’t those who do not have homes considered a tragedy?

This sweet daughter of mine, has me thinking of this man daily now and how we can help. Maybe its a simple meal for lunch, maybe its a kind conversation, maybe its just the acknowledgement that yes, he is sitting there on the same corner of the street every day for the past several years.  Today, I will pledge to help this man in some way. i want my children to know that they can make a difference in the community,no matter how small. Even the smallest gestures can lead to the biggest impacts in others lives. The community event that we attended started out as an idea for barrel racing to raise money and turned into quite the event. While this event will make an impact on those children financially, there can be no price placed on the impact it has had on me!

How can you make a differene today?

Posted in mommyhood

Spring Break Fun: Creating a fairy garden

Spring break is in the air! The kids get to let their hair down, and relax for the next week to come. Unfortunately I still have to work this week, but will take a couple of days off to enjoy some time with the kiddos. The girls have been hooked on this fairy garden idea lately and I promised them they could make on  spring break.

Now, this sounds all well and dandy except I am pretty sure that I have what you call a black thumb when it comes to gardening. No really, I kill every plant I touch! So to plant a couple of flowers for the fairy garden is a far stretch for me. I began looking up plants that are low maintenance and cactuses  looked good to me. Desert fairy garden anyone? No.. the girls wouldn’t let me buy a cactus either. They mentioned something about not wanting the fairies to get poked.

Eventually we just decided on a couple of annuals, that may or may not die in a couple of days. I will let ya’ll know! Since I have never so much as planted a seed in our yard, we had to buy everything we needed. Gardening can be expensive ya’ll! Anyways, add a little fairy, fairy house, maybe a cute little dragon and you have yourself a fairy garden! Because one garden isn’t enough we also made a mermaid garden thanks to Michael’s for having those options. Just add a few lights, and you have yourself some magic in your very front yard. WE even found a cute little garden gnome named Winston to watch over our gardens for us. HE is a very chill gnome, seems to like hanging by the palm trees and soaking up the sun.

The girls love their gardens and I loved working in the yard with them. Shh.. Don’t tell anyone I said that. I typically  do not like any resemblance of yard  work! Spring break day one was a huge success! Now, I have to go to work tomorrow while the kids enjoy spending time with their cousin for the day. Why can’t parents get spring break? Oh well, I took off work Wednesday, so only a couple more days, and we will have some more fun planned! What are your spring break plans this year?